Modeling

Last night at my house I was able to get a glimpse of my parenting style. Normally my oldest son and I are the ones who play the Wii together. However last night, I was busy with some household chores and my wife was watching him play when he asked her to play Wii Sports Tennis Golf with him.

If you have ever played these versions of golf and tennis before, you know they are not the most accurate. I could hear my wife starting to get frustrated with the game when my son decided he was going to "coach" her a little bit.

From the other room, I started hearing these phrases:

• It's ok
• You can do it
• That was close
• That was closer

Then when she had some sucess, I started to hear these phrases:

• That's better
• You're doing great
• Good job

It made me smile to hear the same phrases I use with him when he was learning the same games a few weeks ago.

This observation made me realize that EVERYTHING I say and do has an impact on the future of my sons.  If I would have modeled an overly critical position while he was learning the games, then that is what would have come across when he was trying to teach my wife how to play. 

It also made me remember a chapter from Michelle Anthony's book called Spiritual Parenting (which will be the basis for our parenting seminar in August.  Here is the excerpt from that chapter.

"The best things your children will learn about God will be from watching you try to find out for yourself. Jesus said, "Seek and you will find." They will not always do what you tell them to do, but they will be -- good and bad -- as they see you being. If your children se eyou seeking, they will seek -- the finding part is up to God." -- Polly Berrien Berends

Then the Michelle Anthony goes on to say this about modeling:

"We have an ever-narrowing window of opportunity to maximize our influence in our children's lives. The fields of psychology and sociology tell us that we parents are the primary influencers in our children's lives from birth until twelve years old. Somehow this is almost a science. It's as if on the eve of their thirteenth birthday their brain chemsitry changes in such a way that all of a sudden the world, music, media, and friends now becomre more influential than we are! I remember thinking this wouldn't happen to my sweet children--but it did! We must be shrewd to use this window of influence and capitalize on it in childhood. I don't want to give that influence to anybody else!

In fact, I want to extend my influence in my children's lives. We can say, "Well sociology and psychology say I am the primary model for my kids from zero to twelve, but by the grace of God I want to be an influence in my child's life until the day I die." I know this is possible because of my parents."

Let me leave you with a prayer to help you be a great model in your children's life.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for entrusting these children to me. Thank you for giving me the privilege of pointing them to you, even though at times I feel so undeserving of this role. Help me to be a spiritual parent -- with eyes to see what matters most to you.

I pray that you will show me how to create environments in my home and in my life in ways that will reflect the truth of who you are in them. I want them to know you accurately and fully.

May our home be a place where truth and love prevail above all else, and may your plans for my children, and myself, be fulfilled as we submit ourselves to your desires. Please reveal your desires to me, and craft my heart so that I will listen and obey. I trust your spirit to guide me and give me the wisdom and power to do the things that you desire.

I am yours. Our home is yours. The children are yours. Be glorified!

Amen.

May 22 in FirstLook and KidQuest

FirstLook

God’s love for His children is often most obvious during difficult times. Jesus’ followers experienced many difficult times during the formation of the early church, as recorded in Acts. Shortly after the death of James, Peter was seized and imprisoned. Because it was the time of the Passover Festival, 16 soldiers were placed as guards for this one man in the prison. Herod wanted to appease the Jews during the celebration of their festival and would wait to hold a public trial until after these celebrations. Not only would this give the Jews their festival, but it would allow Herod a larger crowd during the trial and execution—making an example of Peter’s death to the zealot groups and messianic movement.

As soon as Peter was taken to prison, a group of believers gathered together in a home to pray for him. Scripture tells us the church prayed earnestly for Peter. God then sent an angel to release him from jail and lead him to safety. Peter being released seemed so unlikely it was easier for the believers to think he had died and his angel, or ghost, had come to tell them. After realizing it was in fact Peter, the faithful group rejoiced. Peter had to quiet them in order to tell them of all that happened that night. He instructed the witnesses to tell James and the others what had happened. Then he left.

“At dawn there was a great commotion among the soldiers about what had happened to Peter” (Acts 12:18 NLT). It was customary that should a prisoner escape, the supervising guard or soldier would then take the punishment intended for the accused. Upon hearing the news of Peter’s escape, Herod commanded a search be made to locate the man. When he was not found, the guards were put to death.

JUST FOR FUN
Gather your family together in the main room of your home to read this part of The Big God Story. Tell your children that you’re going to read about a time when people gathered in a home to pray. Then read together Acts 12:5–14.

Ask your children who led Peter out of prison, and what the people in the church were doing while Peter was in jail. Remind them that God answers our prayers too. Encourage them to share anything they would like your family to pray for. Also pray about any important things going on in the lives of your family and friends. Start by thanking God for who He is before spending time huddled together praying for your requests. You might want to keep a list of your prayer requests and update each other when one of these prayers has been answered!

Share with your children that what they just heard is a part of The Big God Story, and they’ll hear more about how God responds to the prayers of His people in church this week.

KidQuest

“Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died,” [Mary said]. When Jesus saw her weeping … he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. Jesus wept. (John 11:32–35)

This is the moment directly before Jesus raised Lazarus from death. This passage is extremely moving. In verse 33, the words “deeply moved” come from the Greek word embrimaomai. This word is used to
describe deep anger and frustration.

Why would Jesus be angry and frustrated at this moment? Some say He was angry at their lack of faith. But others suggest that Jesus was angry at death itself—the great enemy. His anger could also have been linked to the grief that death inflicted upon the people He loved.

After this, Jesus showed another strong emotion: sadness. When the mourners told Jesus to “come and see” where Lazarus had been laid, “Jesus wept.” In the original language, the mourners were wailing: klaio. In contrast, “Jesus wept”: dakryo. He shed tears of empathy. Those who saw Him weep said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?” (John 11:37). When Jesus heard this, He was again “deeply moved”—embrimaomai. Full of this emotion Jesus said, “Lazarus, come out!” (v. 43).

In this passage, Jesus used His power to glorify God and prove He is the One who can save us from the enemy of death. Because many believed in Him after this, the high priest worried there would be an uprising and decided Jesus must die. Yet, what he did not know is that Jesus would rise again.

JUST FOR FUN
Play a game of hide-and go-seek with your kids this week. When you can’t find each other, call, “come out, come out, wherever you are!” Gather your family and tell them you are going to read about a time when Jesus called His friend to “come out.” Then read John 11:32–44.

Be amazed together that Jesus has power over death, including His own. Because of this, He has the power to give life to all who believe in Him. Ask your children how they think the people watching felt when they saw Lazarus walk out of his tomb. Then, discuss how Jesus loved Lazarus and his family enough to weep with them. Share with them that Jesus loves them that much too. Ask: “Is there anything you want to talk to Jesus about that is making you sad?” Share a time of prayer together, talking to God about whatever is on your heart.

Remind your children that what they just heard is a part of The Big God Story in the Bible. Tell them in church this week they will hear more about how Jesus has power over death.

May 15 in FirstLook

Its time for a new environment. The past 4 weeks, your elementary student was exposed to the compassion of Jesus and how he served those he came in contact with. Over the next 4 weeks, they will begin to see how Jesus loved and respected them as well.

For us the environment of "Love & Respect" means this:
Without love, our faith becomes futile. Children need to experience love and respect in order to receive and give God's grace. Innate in this environment is the value that children are respected because they embody the image of God. We must speak TO them, not AT them, and we must commit as parents and as a church, to an environment where love and acceptance are never withheld due to one's behavior.

In the early days after Jesus’ ascension, God’s love compelled many people to respond in  faith. With a population of over 500,000, Antioch enjoyed a prosperous economy due to the strategic placement of the city at the crossroads for highly trafficked trade routes to the south (Palestine and Egypt), east to Persia, and west to the Asia Minor Peninsula. This ancient metropolitan city was a blend of many cultures, beliefs, and practices whose value for art and literature was praised by many. The city referred to as “Queen of the East” was also known for its extravagant, wasteful, and reckless behavior.

When the church in Jerusalem heard what was happening in Antioch, they sent Barnabus—a godly and faith-filled man—to visit. During his stay, Barnabus was a witness to the blessing of God upon this gathering of believers. He was a witness to all that was happening among the people. During his first stay, many more turned and put their faith in the Lord. Barnabus left Antioch long enough to bring Saul—who had once persecuted and killed followers of “The Way”—to Antioch to stay with him for a year teaching the Word of God.

It is from this time of God’s Spirit moving in Antioch that we see the beginning of the Gentile movement: the first Gentile church, the first missionaries, and the first act of generous financial giving for another local church community. It is here in Antioch that believers were first named Christians—Christianoi, which means “partisans of Christ.” What citizens of the city may have intended as a coining in jest, the followers of “The Way” embraced as a fitting title to describe their new identity.

JUST FOR FUN

Find a place in your home where you can move about easily. Explain to your children that as you read this portion of Scripture, you’re going to be moving from room to room in your home. Invite them to pretend that each room is a different city the disciples traveled to or from. Begin reading Acts 11:19–30, standing in one room; each time you get to a part where the people “came” or “went” to a new city, move to a different room in your home.

Once you’ve finished reading, ask your children why they think the people scattered. Discuss together what Barnabas told the people to do.

Explain to your children that just like God gave His disciples unique abilities, He has also given each of us special abilities to be used to build His kingdom here on earth. Ask them to share what some of theirs might be.

Remind your children that what they just heard is part of The Big God Story, and they’ll hear more about God’s love in church this week. Pray together thanking God that His love helps us respond to all He desires for us to do.

May 15 In KidQuest -- Love and Respect

Its time for a new environment. The past 4 weeks, your elementary student was exposed to the compassion of Jesus and how he served those he came in contact with. Over the next 4 weeks, they will begin to see how Jesus loved and respected them as well.

For us the environment of "Love & Respect" means this:
Without love, our faith becomes futile. Chidlren need to experience love and respect in order to receive and give God's grace. Innate in this environment is the value that children are respected becasue they embody the image of God. We must speak TO them, not AT them, and we must commit as parents and as a church, to an environment where love and acceptance are never withheld due to one's behavior.

God’s desire is for restoration: spiritually, physically, and emotionally. In Genesis, God created man “from the dust of the ground.” By healing the blind man with mud, Jesus demonstrated again that He is the Creator. He was revealing the Truth of John 1:3:

“Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.”

That fact didn’t escape the blind man, because he said in John 9:33, “If this man were not from God, he could do nothing.” This might be a confusing statement, considering the fact that we see magicians performing signs throughout Scripture. However, the blind man realized, through faith, that Jesus is God.

Jesus did not just heal the blind man physically; He also healed him socially. After he was healed, his physical ailment no longer excluded him from the community or (according to the religious leaders) condemned him as a sinner. But most importantly, Jesus healed the blind man spiritually.

In John 9, we first saw the blind man as a beggar, condemned as a sinner by his community. Then, we saw him progress to a state of dignity—even to the point of standing up to the Pharisees. Finally, we watched as Jesus loved and respected the blind man enough to restore him—mind, body, and soul. Then, we rejoiced with him as he came to a state of belief, worshipping Jesus, the Son of Man.

JUST FOR FUN
This week take turns blindfolding yourself and your children while trying to do something that is in the normal rhythm of your everyday life (folding a shirt, sweeping the floors, making your bed etc.). Discuss how hard it is to work when you can’t see! Then, read about how Jesus healed a blind man in John 9:1–12.

After reading this part of The Big God Story, ask your children how they think the blind man might have felt after Jesus healed him? Did Jesus have to touch the man to heal him? Talk together about why they think Jesus touched the man. Together as a family, thank God that He loves us so much and desires to heal us. If someone in your family has specific needs for healing, take this time to lift these up to God in prayer.

Share with your children that what they just heard is a part of The Big God Story in the Bible, and they will hear more about how Jesus restores in church this week.

Exciting New App for Parents!

I just found out about this app...check it out. This comes from the blog orangeleaders.com

Cue the Parents!

Posted: 5/3/11 by Orange Leaders

Do you have any parents in your ministry who are busy? Maybe a better question is: Do you know any parents who aren’t busy? Most parents want to connect with their kids regularly, but just don’t know how to make the time to start those conversations. What if you could cue parents each day to make spiritual conversations a part of their daily routine?

 With the Parent Cue app, you can!

The Parent Cue app provides videos, music, and discussion starters specifically designed for Drive Time, Meal Time and Hang Time. Plus, a new Parent Time full of resources to enrich each parent in your ministry. The app also provides a weekly plan so that each day parents are cued with a new tool to connect with their kids.

A preview version of Parent Cue is available for free in the App Store. Later this month, an update will be available that completes the app, fixes the bugs, and makes the videos load faster. Also, Parent Cue will be available for Android later this month.

So, get ready to announce this great new tool to your parents at your June FX or your first Sunday service in June. Your families will want this tool for the summer and beyond!

For updated information on the Parent Cue app, and for further insights into 252 Basics and children’s ministry, checkout the 252 Basics blog at http://252blog.com/.